I'm a 22 year old college student, and when I'm usually walking around campus or near classrooms, I'm often teased by girls who see me and laugh loudly or hold their laughter. In high school my classmates said I looked like Baldknobber, and I was probably made fun of for that reason. Whenever I encounter this kind of thing, my heart is especially hard, angry and frustrated, my mood fluctuates a lot, and I can't help but think nonsense, and although I try to control myself, my negative emotions still linger. What should I do to cope with this situation?
Hello, friend!
In college, there are girls who will scoff or hold their laughter when they see you, and this makes you feel overwhelmed, angry and uncomfortable.
➖ Let's start by talking about where this emotion comes from.
➡️ not confident in their appearance.
When someone in high school told you that you looked like Baldy, the comment probably hurt you deeply and made you ask yourself often: do I really look like him? Why do I look like this?
This has always made you a bit self-conscious, and when you get to college, girls' laughter tends to make you feel like you're laughing at yourself. It's uncomfortable for anyone to get too much attention or make fun of.
➡️ cares too much about what others see, which is actually a sign of low self-esteem.
This may be related to your past upbringing, such as the harshness and negativity of your parents or people around you, which made you feel that "I am not good enough" from a young age.
So, you are now particularly concerned about your image and always want to be recognized by others to compensate for low self-esteem.
If people don't give you the response you expect, you'll be as hard to accept and angry as you are now.
The ➡️ heart yearns for a girl's approval.
From your description, the teasing seems to be coming from girls, which tends to reflect that you may want a relationship, but that high school remark made it impossible for you to let go around girls.
In order to escape this discomfort, you may subconsciously protect yourself by saying, "Girls are laughing at me, I can't get along with them.
➖ I'll share a few suggestions below.
➡️ correctly perceive other people's laughter.
When girls see you laughing, is it something you think about yourself, or do you actually hear them talking about it? If it's the former, you're probably being overly sensitive and taking the occasional laugh personally.
Even if the laugh is because of you, it's not necessarily ridicule. You say you look like a skinhead and think it's an unflattering image, but someone else might think it's cute or funny, and the laugh might be well-intentioned.
If it's the latter, it's because they're poorly qualified, educated girls don't just laugh at people, and there's no need for you to get angry at people like that.
➡️ boosts self-confidence.
We can't change the way we look, but we can change the way we look inside, such as our temperament and mannerisms. In heterosexual relationships, the first impression is based on the face, but the long term relationship depends on the character and emotional intelligence.
Don't always obsess about appearance, cultivate your charisma more, such as paying attention to your speech and behavior, confident people are more likely to attract people.
➡️ Open your mind and communicate more.
You've been shutting yourself away and judging reality by your imagination. The only way to truly understand how others perceive you is to get out there and make friends, especially of the opposite sex.
Be bold and try to socialize and use your sincerity and humor to win recognition.
I hope these suggestions help.
I wish you a slow improvement in your mood.